New Year's Resolutions

I can't believe it has been so long since I last posted and that Christmas has come and gone. I had a lovely Christmas and hope you did as well--perhaps later I will go into some of the very nice gifts I received. But now we are on to New Years and that means New Years resolutions. As you know I recently read Bridget Jones's Diary in an attempt to inspire my own diary writing (which is working very nicely). Those of you who have read this fabulous book will know that it begins with a rather lengthy list of Bridget's resolution. Well, I thought some of these resolutions were quite good so I've decided to start off my new year by being lazy and copying some of her resolutions (I had initially thought I would copy all her resolutions cause I would have been guaranteed success in some of them like less alcohol and cigarettes, but then I decided while the continued victory over these things may have temporarily made me feel successful in the end I would have known that I was no better off than when I began--and being better off is kind of the whole point--also am obviously not going to be working on my grammar this year).

I Will Not:

1. Behave sluttishly around the house, but instead imagine others are watching. (read lazy for sluttishly)
2. Allow in-tray to rage out of control. (read mailbox for in-tray)
3. Get annoyed with family.
4. Get upset over men, but instead be poised and cool ice-queen. (only I don't want to be an ice-queen so strike that last bit)
5. B**** about anyone behind their backs, but be positive about everyone.
6. Sulk about have no boyfriend, but develop inner poise and authority and sense of self as woman of substance, complete without boyfriend.

I Will:

1. Reduce circumference of thighs by 3 inches (i.e. 1 1/2 inches each). (read lose 10 pounds here as I am hopeless at properly measuring thighs--how do you know if you are measuring in the same spot)
2. Purge flat of all extraneous matter.
3. Give all clothes which have not worn for two years or more to homeless. (read give all horrible clothes that I wear only when all my decent clothes are dirty away--feel sorry for homeless)
4. Improve career and find new job with potential.
5. Make better use of time. (read watch less tv here--yeah for writers strike as soon will be nothing good to watch on tv anyway)
6. Not go out every night but stay in and read books and listen to classical music. (very good match for no. 5)
7. Go to gym three times a week not merely to buy sandwich. (hurrah, my gym doesn't even sell sandwiches)
8. Make up compilation "mood" tapes so can have tapes ready with all favorite romantic/dancing/rousing/feminist etc. tracks assembled instead of turning into drink-sodden DJ-style person with tapes scattered all over floor.

Also, feel that I should put up some good religious things:

1. Will read Book of Mormon again at least once. (needn't correspond with Sunday School lessons since am currently exiled to nursery)
2. Will read Joseph Smith lessons. (Will correspond with Relief Society Lessons as a way of uniting with my sisters everywhere)
3. Will read from Preach My Gospel at least 10 minutes every day.
4. Will continue good work of writing in journal.
5. Will continue good work of Family History.

Also will be reporting once a month to you on my resolutions as a means of forcing myself to do at least some of them.